Mummy! Mummy! Mummmmmmmmyyyyyyy!!!!! The sound I hate and yet love so much. Being a mum is one of the things I dreamed of all my life and so when I discovered that finally I was going to be a mum I was over the moon with excitement. I had no idea that I was in for a one way bittersweet journey of no return. Nine months have never felt longer!!! It was marked by morning sickness, anxiety, fatigue, stress, discomfort, pride, joy, fear, and every other emotion that is common to man. This is the point when you begin to wonder if you could do this over again, you actually quietly determine in your heart that you will never do this again. The beauty though, is that each day brings you a day closer to the end, a light at the end of the tunnel.
Soon, when the nine months have run their course, the little bundle of joy is ushered into the world amidst so much joy and excitement. One look at his sweet little face and all the negative memories from the nine months are wiped away. Your heart is filled with so much gratitude, a love and joy like no other known to man.
The celebration is short lived as you soon realise that this new comer comes with a set of rules and an unwritten manual which you can only ignore at your peril. Then of course there’s the sleepless nights, uncertainty about so many things, not to mention the numerous, costly and unnecessary visits to the Doctor only to be told the baby is ok, whatever you are fretting about is perfectly normal. Eventually you get the hang of things. As the days go by you get more confident than the previous. Days turn to weeks and weeks to months then months to years. You soon forget the unpleasant bits and boom, you relive the experience over and over. Suddenly you are now a mother to four beautiful little angels with very limited experience.
At this point the responsibilities and requirements are so extensive, basically engaging you twenty four hours a day, seven days a week. You are constantly multitasking, constantly on your feet, constantly exerting yourself, amidst cries of “mummy this” and “mummy that”. You even learn to be immune as you develop the skill to discern the serious cries of “I am in pain or uncomfortable,” “I am hungry”, from the less serious ones of “I just need your attention”, “I am bored”.
There are definitely many pros about this journey, you learn so much and grow on so many fronts as you sharpen your negotiation and interpersonal skills. You practice medicine, finance and culinary arts, wearing several hats whenever the need arises. Many mums struggle at this point and finally make the conscious decision to become stay home mums because they cannot take the risk of delegating the mum job to someone else. You basically have to give up your life for a while, “the mummy job”, it is all encompassing but the meaningful connections that you make and the feeling that you get from raising your children are immeasurable. Delegating this task means you are definitely going to miss out on some of the rewards of mothering and watching your child grow daily, hitting each milestone one at a time, one day at a time.
It gives a mother pure joy and pride to see their children grow up into healthy, well-mannered and responsible people. It makes all the hard work worth it. On the contrary children that turn up ill-mannered and disrespectful brings much sorrow and shame to their mums.
“A wise son makes a glad father, but a foolish son is the grief of his mother. “ Proverbs 10:1