In healthy relationships, partners are not forced into submission. We live in a world where we do not like to be told what to do or how to act. The irony is though that if we want to grow in our relationships, women have got to submit to their men. Submission is an act that is expressed mutually and voluntarily. With submission comes respect and love for the one in power.
The book of Ephesians tells wives to submit to their husbands. Women usually look at this verse as being sexist which is not the case. This perception by women sometimes makes it difficult for men to love them. Some women come off as overly independent and do not know how to let a man be a man. To them the act of being submissive portrays weakness and men thinking of them as being inferior.
Some men also abuse this verse. They see it as an opportunity to control women. They expect women to obey without question. I believe this is a fault of cultural standards where men lead by ruling while women obey by compulsion. They forget to read the verses that follow where husbands are encouraged to love their wives. We all know that love never comes from a place of control and abuse.
Being submissive helps perfect the art of compromise. Blindly agreeing to every need and request or being overly rigid is dangerous for a relationship. It also helps us to consider the desires of others. It eliminates the need to prove our independence and also removes the need to be in control. We are not afraid to let someone else take the lead because we know we are just as capable of the same if given the chance.
Do not confuse obedience with submission. Submission is yielding to power or authority. While obedience is following orders, commands and power or authority. (Dictionary definition). The two are definitely not the same. Submission carries a higher weight as compared to obedience. Let me use an illustration to further explain this.
Imagine there are 2 ladies. A and B. A is equally as wealthy as her husband while B solely depends on her husband. Both ladies plan a girls’ trip. A can afford to pay for all her expenses while B can’t. They both decide to go and inform their husbands about their plans. But the husbands tell them not to go and they stay. Lady A is being submissive while lady B is simply obeying.
I know you may be wondering where the difference comes in. A is submissive because she has 2 options. She can go with for the trip or stay. Her deciding to stay is submission while B is obeying because she has no other option but to stay.
Obedience does not guarantee a person’s willingness to comply with order.