Hey!!! Let’s talk Public Shaming… right? Is it effective? Is it necessary? Why do we do it anyway? What happened to the old-fashioned speaking to the individual? Have you been a victim? Have you made someone else a victim?
Someone once told me that Public Shaming is an act done by an insecure person seeking public approval and validation. They do this to capitalize on the pain of another whilst creating a cloud of tension around them.
Also, I have come to learn that being a public shamer compromises the relationships in your life. Take a walk with me for a second here: the people that surround you are either there because they fear being shamed or lack personal self-esteem and similarly require approval from the shamer to make them feel valued. In fact, in most cases, this individual requires validation from the shamer to feel important.
Now one would think this is just a child thing and when people grow, they grow out of these things. I have come to learn that as adults we only modify the playfield. The shame game still goes on. Why? I don’t have the slightest clue.
The way I see it, if any you only get the feel of power at the point of contact but lose it as soon as the very people from whom you seek approval realize they too could be victims at any time or even that the things you do are not funny. Suddenly you are alone and empty. No matter how many people are around you, the echo of the void is overwhelming.
Everyone wants to be loved by a genuine love: a trustworthy love but this kind of love from a fellow human being is often worked upon. It needs to be a two-way street otherwise the weight becomes too heavy to bear for the one continuously giving. Soon they let go maybe not of the love but of the object that causes them pain.