Dear Self,

You are not God. Stop trying to fix all the worlds’ problems, yo aren’t built for that.

Have you ever been in a hole so deep you lose yourself? Maybe not lose yourself completely. You’re still able to catch glimpses of you or who you think you’re supposed to be but cannot quite get there. Before you can figure out the next step there’s something else scratching for your attention. Suddenly you’re not doing anything right for I guess many different reasons. Maybe because you don’t know how and don’t want to go through the how to steps or you’re so distracted by something else you can’t focus or maybe you just don’t care anymore.

Each step just seems to be darker and emptier. How do you get yourself out?

Someone once told me that sometimes you need to pretend to be someone else in order to find out who you are. Confusing right! Because I would think pretending to be someone else can make you lose who you are. I don’t know I guess things are generally a little overwhelming at the moment.

Also, It’s exhausting being okay all the time.

You are probably thinking what! Being okay all the time is the ultimate goal. But here’s the thing we are human beings not machines. There’s this thing called emotions that goes on with us. Then of course the mind of discernment. And don’t get me started on how different each individual is from another no matter the origin, family, background, color or religion. Yes we are all people but we are also individuals.

Hiding in groups is always the easy part. I mean then you don’t have to be singled out but when the music fades and all is stripped away for some they are just tired completely burnt out, some excited… some embrace the silence and relax but for some emptiness comes rushing in.

I mumbling but I guess what I am trying to say is it’s okay to feel down and sometimes not even know why. I think the problem is we struggle to fight the feeling instead of dealing with it and then it just becomes complicated.
It’s like when you spill red wine on a white satin shirt, you can put a sweater over it but the stain will not only remain where you left it but it imprisons you.

Hey but life is a journey. We learn unlearn, fall, rise up, laugh and cry, have outbursts or don’t , love or hate. Eventually the goal is to rise above it all.

Love,
Lolo

Leah Grace Oketcho, is a highly talented Communication specialist, gifted in leadership with over 3 years of leadership and management experience at different levels. She is a team player and has demonstrated ability in mobilizing and organizing others to achieve desired goals. Oketcho is well vast in the art of creating alternatives for ways to get results. She has over the years grown in the art of corporate communications and also participated in the development of performance management materials for various professional institutions. Leah received training in research, scripting, international relations, and data analysis as well as public relations. She is passionate about solving public health related problems. She has offered training to youth in oral and written communication, people management and mentoring, editing and documentation skills, public speaking.

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